the lesbian retreat in the woods

So here's a thing that happened on Friday: I sent a message to a lady on couchsurfing.com who listed herself as a queer person in Cape Town to contact and asked what she was up this weekend, she said she wished she was going on the Cape Town Lesbians retreat, and poof! Fifteen minutes later I was going on the Cape Town Lesbians retreat. So I just got back from camping with 100 lesbians for a few days, NO BIG DEAL. Here are my updates:

1. Many people speak a lot of Afrikkans here! Which makes me unbelievably popular. I would sit there, nursing a beer, and nervously laughing at the correct places in some group situations. Oh foreign travel.
2. Some people do not like Americans abroad! I had one lady (who was, to be fair, INCREDIBLY drunk) tell me that I did not appear to belong there, and then later say something about how she wasn't "like a stuck up American bitch/bastard." I responded to this by staying far away from that one lady for the rest of the retreat which completely solved the problem. The reaction appeared to be due to a combination of things though, including my inability to communicate in Afrikkans (see above) and my unpopular lawyer status.
3. HOWEVER, being a lawyer is popular with some people, read, amazing law-studying activists from UCT! Who I met some of.
4. ALSO, overall this community was super super welcoming and fun and awesome. I probably shouldn't have started with the downer. I headed in to this weekend bearing nothing but water and granola bars and was promptly fed, liquored, and smoked out for three days straight. There was swimming in the river. There was swimming in the pool. There was much dancing to Rihanna. There was a wet tshirt contest and a talent show. It was pretty much everything you would hope for a lesbian retreat in the woods.

AND, Cape Town for the win!

Renewed relevance!

I arrived a few hours ago in one of the southernmost countries in the world, namely South Africa. Suddenly this blog is once again appropriately named! So here goes my triumphant return to blogging.

I sat on the plane to Frankfurt next to a girl from Caro, Michigan who had never crossed the Atlantic before. We exchanged pleasantries about what we were doing with our lives. She was going on a week-long trip to Berlin before heading back to Caro and her boyfriend who is "the" elementary school teacher there. This was probably her one trip--the big trip!--to a foreign land. I guessed her age incorrectly because she hadn't gone to a four year college and was subsequently overwhelmed by privilege.

My new apartment is in Obs, the trendy mixed race neighborhood near the university. Since I don't have a key yet I have left only once, to visit the grocery store with my roomie. This particular roommate is actually moving out for unclear reasons but it appears to have something to do with him being 20 years old and not washing his dishes. My other roommates will start appearing progressively--one gets in tomorrow, and one next week.

My main adventure so far is that I bought Rooibus flavored yogurt! And I am happy to report it is delicious.

So long

I don't think I will write in this blog anymore, since it is misnamed for my future life which will probably not involve being on the southernmost continent. I will make another silly blog that I most likely won't write in very often. 

Tonight I sat in a room with 20 firefighters at a goodbye party. They were sitting in the dark drinking from a handle of Jack Daniels and forcing each other to tell sex stories. I was going to work in a few minutes. I learned that one lieutenant considers a girl fat if she's 80% of his body weight, and that Saunders caught his parents making out one time. They have not touched a woman in a long time. 

I am a California girl as I have realized that what I miss most is smoothies. 

jeez

I just ate another piece of probably 10 year dead chicken and felt a little gaggy. It is time to return to the world again and eat things that just grew on trees and smell smells and go hiking. New Zealand in seven days and counting. 

Also, it is Valentine's day. I am making a card out of copy paper and highlighters. Happy February to everyone, happy Valentine's day if you like it. 

I think I only got into college because I had smart friends

It is disconcerting how poorly I handle night shift. What is night shift, really? Just being alone a lot. I am proud of people who do well with being alone. I think that people are meant to live in herds. Why else are we slowly migrating in like moths to a flame? People over generations are tumbling towards city life, leaving even the most beautiful of places for the creations and elations of the pack. Mystic hermits notwithstanding there is something we need other people for. Particularly me. I seem to need other people in order to be happy, and in order to want to do anything other than sleep. This I find disconcerting.

I am eating an Otter Pop and it is delicious. I wish I could make myself work on something, but I think I will read instead.

Here's the other thing

I think you need to spend more than one season in Antarctica to really get it. It's like...hmmm...Synergy. Not to say that Synergy is a hierarchical society in a confined space full of crazy people and too much alcohol. I love Synergy. But in order to feel like you get it, you need to stay for more than one year and assume a role in the place. Or at least in order for the crazy to really sink in.

When you get here to McMurdo, you are just off-balance, dealing with the way the sun shines all the time and your nose bleeds because it's so cold and your hands are cracked from the dry air and the mandatory hand-washing and there are almost 1,000 people you have never met leering at you (if you are female). And what you don't notice is that all of these people (who are naturally very interesting) are doing interesting things with their time all the time which isn't always just drinking. Often the drinking involves other things too. For example, in the past week or so we had an art party at the carpentry shop that was full of exhibits and food fights in tyvek suits, a funk concert in the waste barn, jello wrestling with the mechanics, a film festival in the galley, and a skinny-dipping event with the Kiwis. Now I was working for about half of these things and was therefore not able to attend, but I am seeing. The key may be to keep coming back, being more and more in the know, and not having to deal with as much social weird because you've already got enough friends.

Anyway I am back in a mood of appreciating Antarctica etc. Happy Sunday. Leaving the continent in a month to go hike New Zealand!

Sheer bragging

Yesterday I received the following email:

"Congratulations!

You have been selected to participate in an upcoming morale trip to
Room With A View
by snow machine to the side of Mount Erebus

Monday, January 26, 2008!
Report to the 2nd floor FSTP breakroom, in the SSC, no later than 1:00 p.m. Monday
WEARING YOUR ECW GEAR!

Please do not be late.

This is a half-day event, and you will return to station at by dinnertime (sooner if the weather sours). On this trip, you will snow machine up to 1,400 feet on Mt. Erebus. This is the point where the Hut Peninsula joins the main body of Ross Island, and it offers a tremendous view of the Erebus Glacier Tongue and the open water in the McMurdo Sound.

You will be riding on snow machines, so wear your warmest ECW gear, including fleece, wind bibs, parka, a hat, mittens, and bunny boots. Wear your warmest/thickest gloves, neck gaiter (highly recommended for comfort when wearing a skidoo helmet), sunscreen, sunglasses, and goggles. Also bring a full water bottle and, of course, a camera! Make sure to bring along extra snacks, hot water for coco and tea will be provided.
You will be back for dinner.

If you are unable to attend, please let the Chalet know by
10:00 am Monday.

· You have been given the half the day off by your supervisor to participate in this activity.

· You will riding on skidoos and will be expected to follow all instructions given to you by the trip leaders.

· If bad weather cancels the trip, it will be rescheduled on another day (or at another location) and you will be moved to the new day pending supervisor approval. The Chalet will keep you updated if there is a change.

· If you are sick or cannot attend the morning of the trip, call the Chalet at 10:00 am sharp!

Thanks, and have a great trip!"

Sometimes I love everything about Antarctica.

Annoying rich globe-trotting ladies eating pasta...hmmm.

I think I am getting a little too worked up about hating Eat Pray Love. Sure, it's a best selling book by a really annoying lady who can't write and seems to think that all it takes is four months on an ashram and a good Latin lover to find fulfillment (a prescription, by the way, far out of reach for most people who are having a midlife crisis). But really, it's nothing that should make me angry for a good hour after I finish reading it. I don't understand how my mind works.

Reworking

I think I have lost something cool about myself in order to be cooler. The other day one of my Antarctican friends told me that when he met me he thought I was "too cool for school." Which I thought was hilarious, because me? My friends and I were literally called "The Nerd Herd" in middle school. And I didn't really care. (Actually I did care, because I was in middle school.) But I suppose I have learned how to project a certain hipness, a certain indifference and cynicism and love for celebrity fashion blogs (why?). But I think all this hip is bad for the soul. It's like smoking--it looks good, and it feels good, but it rots you slowly.

I was thinking about this because I am thinking about working with teenagers again and I'm not sure I have the same inner security that I used to and that you need to work with teenagers. Do I want to be a role model? I drink a lot.

Hopefully will regain bearings once I am back on a continent that is less weird. Ok.

On a kind of related note, yesterday I bought a t-shirt that says "You don't have to be crazy to work here...We'll train you!" with a big picture of Antarctica. So true.

Professional dispatcher

I think I may be working as a dispatcher in Yosemite this summer! I talked to the people and they sounded stoked, I am stoked, I get to live in a cabin in Yosemite, yes sir. Love it.

Things I do like

1. Mexican food day in the mess hall
2. The view of Mt. Discovery from my back deck
3. Firemen and women
4. Free yoga classes
5. The fact that it's snowing right now

more things I am sure

Things I don't like

Has some engaged dude ever followed you into the bathroom and tried to make out with you on your birthday while you were trying to peacefully drink champagne out of a can in a hut in Antarctica? Well, I hate it when that happens. Because really, the more he says "But it wouldn't mean anything!" the more I think oh good, I would mean so little to you that I could be one of those neat footnotes you tell your buds at the bachelor party and never even feel guilty about because I am that special thanks. Except not, because I said Hell no buddy, and then locked the bathroom door behind me with dignity and grace.

Note to engaged guys: maybe your fiance would not find out. Maybe she wouldn't even care. But I'm not really looking to start relationships of any kind with guys who have made a promise to only love some other woman for the rest of their life.

This is not meant in any way to judge you, if engaged guys are your thing.

Nightshift

It is official: I have become a boring person. All I do with my life is watch movies on the TV in the middle of the night. Sometimes I do Rosetta Stone Spanish too. Either way it is not an interesting thing to tell stories about. Someday I will stop being a nightshift worker and see other people again. That time is not now.

Millions of condoms

They ship millions of condoms to Antarctica. I am discovering why very slowly, but as the season drags on I learn more and more little secrets about people sneaking off and doing it. I think half the firehouse has mated with the other half. I hope this ends up producing a firehouse baby, which will be large, boisterous, and hopefully not slapping anybody in the nuts.

Now that no one reads this anymore

I am thinking about staying here for the winter. Is that crazy? It's a little crazy. Perhaps I will change my mind. Perhaps no one will hire me for the winter. But! This Antarctic lifestyle is growing on me. It's growing so familiar. I chain smoke. I drink vodka. I see the same people in the dining hall. Other people cook all my meals.  I hang out with Kirk the Destroyer and he tells me about the stripper he dated when he was 15.

There's something appealing about staying here for the 24 hours a day of darkness. There are only 200 people on the base, stuck in a building in the coldest winter in the world. Why don't they kill each other? Do they start to run around naked in the snow? Do the men steal the women from each other, and does the community scratch out someone's eyes ritually every month? I want to feel what it's like to be insane.

Then again, this may be the worst idea I have ever had and I may not go through with it. In which case, backpacking New Zealand here I come!..in March.

There is something wrong with my body

Hopefully it's not serious. But I went to bed last night at 7 PM and I got up today at 11 AM for lunch. And then I went back to bed. Until 4 PM. When I had to get up for tour guide training. I tried to drink a lot of coffee at dinner but I went home and started watching a movie with Jennifer Aniston in it and I couldn't summon enough strength to find something else that didn't suck. 

Bed again soon. 

gah

When you don't sleep are you always plagued by the sensation that you are acting really strange? Like, I'm not sure if I actually act strange, but I keep feeling like everyone must be saying to themselves, what's up with Alisa? She's all standoffish and weird. Her eyes are all puffy. I think she hates me. I hate her. Something like that.

I need to sleep more I think.

Very well, thanks, and you?

Things are well in Antarctica! I have started studying for the LSATs and have already been called a weenie once! This is great. I have learned to play cribbage (poorly) and am proud. Soon I will have a radio show! No one will listen to it. It will be much like this blog.

Penguins

are adorable.

Things I do

This is the story of how I accidentally took a sleeping pill at work.

So, here I am at work yesterday, as emergency dispatch. I am tired and have a sore throat. I think to myself, self, there is some aspirin and such in the drawer there, maybe there is some kind of cough drop. So I am rooting around looking for a cough drop, and find a bottle of chewable peppermint pills. This sounds good, I think to myself, chewable, perhaps soothing, I like peppermint. I have eaten a pill and am examining the bottle when two things happen at once. One, I realize that the bottle says to take these as a sleep aid, only at bedtime. Two, the phone rings with an emergency call. I then take two emergency calls at once.

I love my life sometimes.